Dating can be exciting but also nerve-wracking, especially during the early stages. Experiencing anxiety early on is normal. When a guy takes longer to text back, it can create a whirlwind of emotions. But it is during this time that we as women must lean back and allow for what is to unfold organically. It is so much easier to lean in and ask questions or initiate contact. But it can also make you (as a woman) the pursuer (masculine energy). I do think that most women would want to be pursued and led because it shows that the man is interested in you hence he is taking the action. So in dating, it helps women to lean back whereas in everything else in life, we need to lean forward and that is where the dilemma comes in. The struggle is being a go-getter with everything else that we use the same concept in dating. So how does a woman stay in her feminine energy when everything around her requires us to be more driven? I’ll list 3 pointers that help women to lean back and let the man come forward.
Focus on YOU
It is important to focus on you. What that means is you do things that you love. Whether it is hitting the gym, painting, writing, boxing etc. You do you. Because it is important to put the energy back into ourselves. This also shows self-love. Do all things that you love and be around people that you normally would.
Do not let the early stages of dating take too much emotional or mental energy because he is too new in your life to take that much space. That energy used (overthinking or getting emotional) on him should be earned. If he hasn’t reached out, don’t initiate contact especially if you’ve seen him only a couple of times. It is still fresh and you both are still learning about each other. If he is as keen as you thought he is, then he will find a way to reach out to you.
During this time, you do all the things you’ve been doing BEFORE he came into your life.
If the guy isn’t texting or making the effort (that’s a sign!)
If a guy who was really keen on you and then suddenly hasn’t texted you, then for the most part, he has lost interest. It could be that he suddenly got sick or something terrible happened, which can occur. So when he does reach out, hear him out if he explains when he has been offline. But the consistent effort is key if he truly wants to pursue you.
He would want to do it if he is into you. He wouldn’t want someone else to have you. He would pursue you because he sees our worth and that would be enough for him to show you how much he wants to be in your life or get to know you. This would be a no-brainer. So there should be no need to second-guess why he hasn’t texted or made any effort.
Observe vs. Lecture
When spending time with a guy, notice what he says and whether his actions match his words. But also by observing you pick up on his priorities and values in life. For example, if a guy who you are getting to know talks too much about sex early on and you feel like he is just into you for that, you can either ask him about his past relationships and how intimate they were. Don’t lecture him on how sex and making love are different. Notice what he says and over time you’ll get a clearer picture of who he is and whether what he says adds up to his values and action.
Lecturing isn’t useful because it comes across as being ‘better than’ and no man wants to feel like he doesn’t know what he is doing or that he has got it wrong. Correct them only when they ask for advice or input. If not, just be a listener and observer. During early stages, how they present themselves is who they are. Take them for that and then decide if they are a good fit for you.
As you follow these 3 pointers it allows you to sit back and let them pursue you. But it also puts you in a feminine space of being desired and wanted. You embrace the attention, be flirty (if that is your nature) and be fun. The more you own your feminine energy, the more men get drawn to you. It is that perfect masculine feminine energy that brings man and woman together.
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